INSTANT LIFE SUBSTITUTE
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Episode 869 - 7 April 2009

Rona and Miranda both heard thunder at the same time, but Miranda was quicker to realise the implications than was Rona. They were sitting in their respective bedrooms in their new house, both having got a little weary of living in isolation with each other (the burden of rent in a three-bedroom house forcing them to stay in more than they'd like to), and when Rona heard Miranda running around the house, footsteps loud on the floorboards, her first instinct was to ignore the commotion. But she couldn't do that forever: she was too naturally curious, so she opened the door to the sound of another bulldozer-rumble of thunder seemingly right over the house, and the accompanying rain falling heavy and fast against the house's outside walls, and she almost got knocked over by Miranda running past, carrying a large saucepan in each hand.

"Leaks!" Miranda shouted, looking over her shoulder as she went past and staring at Rona urgently. "We didn't think about leaks!"

They hadn't. Their old house had been so sturdy that they'd forgotten the possibility of leaks even occurring, and it had been so long since it'd really rained, rained hard enough to come through a house, that, as Miranda said, neither of them had thought about it. Not that it would've made a difference to their options, Rona thought as she followed Miranda down the hallway.

She almost tripped over a pot placed right in the middle of the hall, under one of the light fittings, and at the same instant she felt a cold drop of water on her head and looked up without thinking, and almost got another drop in her eye.

"Four, now!" Miranda shouted desperately. "One right on top of the T.V.! Shit!" Rona had lost sight of Miranda, but Miranda assumed that she was following and tried to stir her into action. "Go to the kitchen!" she shouted. "Get all the pots you can find!"

"What?" Rona shouted as Miranda's words were engulfed by another round of thunder like a lion's roar, and the house was lit on-off in lightning blue. But by now Rona had an idea what Miranda was saying anyway; she turned around and started jogging back to the kitchen. She saw out of the corner of her eye a bulge growing like a bruise under the surface of one wall. The rain was louder than the thunder now. Rain hard enough to fall right through a house. Almost incidentally, Rona noticed how draughty the house was, too, as she kneeled down to reach into the kitchen cupboards and pull out armfuls of saucepans.